Miscellaneous stuff

I am back from Langkawi, people.

Omg so irritating!!!

MSN is being fucked up right now, so I cannot sign into BOTH MSN Live Messenger AND the old lao pok Windows Messenger!!

And I NEED TO COMPLAIN!!

Recently it seems that a lot of people are starting to play on Viwawa.com, a site that allows people to play online Mahjong (among other things) with the other frustrated people who also cannot find MJ kakis in real life (or are unwilling to travel out of house to play MJ, etc).

The problem with MJ is, besides the fact that people slowly start to play bigger and bigger until it starts to become a liability, is that MJ, being a game where money is involved afterall, BRINGS OUT THE WORST IN PEOPLE.

If somebody just threw a Zhong and you throw a Zhong next round only to pay for a 5 tai limit, there is nothing funny about it. Or, if you want to win a 5 tai limit only to have the guy in front of you win your winning card first, that is enough to send the best-tempered of us up in fury.

If those are not enough, perhaps you can try my faithful MJ situation: Throw what draw what. Awesome.

SO.

Online MJ is better in this sense, because you only feel a tad annoyed as there is no money involved anyway, and you don't have to face other people's tempers.

Unfortunately, this also means that you are playing with fucking idiots most of the time, because fucking idiots are everywhere.

Ok la, actually to be fair I think most people playing Viwawa are quite ok, except a handful.

This is one conversation I had with a girl. (From what I remember of course)

Stupidly enough, when I first joined (with Wanyi's urging) I didn't know my user id would be shown to everyone whom I play MJ with, so I chose XIAXUE.

Naturally, that is not the wisest choice, although it is indeed a good conversation starter - not that I wanna converse with these people most of the time.


Stupid girl: Xiaxue?

Me: Yeah?

SG: Is that your real name or are you just copying that bitch?

- She apparently never considered it an option that it could really be me.-

Me: Eh... It's my real name. Very unfortunate to share with her.

SG: Oh. Good. I don't like her.

Me: Why?

SG: No reason. I don't know also leh. I just don't like lor.


(Chao CB don't like people also must have at least a reason right? At least she say she don't like my face also better than this rubbish.)


Me: OK.

SG: She's a bitch man.


(Continue insulting me somemore! Lao niang never saw her in my life and never did anything to her!)

- After another 10 mins of peaceful playing with mundane chatting -

SG, asking table in general: How old are you guys?

Me: I'm 24 this year.

SG: I'm 17. (Juvenile idiots...)

SG, continues: Anyone here from SP?

Me: I was from SP last time.

SG: Oh! So what are you doing now?

Me: What if I told you I am blogging for a living?

- There was a pregnant 3 sec pause -

SG: I suppose that's possible.


OMG SHE IS SO FUCKING RETARDED SHE STILL DOESN'T GET IT?! HOW MANY FULL-TIME BLOGGERS ARE THERE FROM SP NICKNAMED XIAXUE?!



At this point, this other guy from the table who has been quietly listening to this conversation decided it's time to burst out of his shy shell.


Other Guy from table: WAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHA SHE IS THE XIAXUE YOU HATE!!!

Stupid girl: ... (she keep doing these dots. You can see that she can clearly express herself very well)

- There was another pregnant pause. -

OGFT: So Xiaxue, how's your nose?

Xiaxue: Good good... One year already!

SG: ...

(OGFT and I chat and ignore the dotting retard)

SG: You are not Xiaxue.

Me: really? Why?

SG: For one your English is not so good.

Me: What?! English here not good or on the blog not good?

SG: Here not good.

Me: I am chatting why would I use perfect English here?!?!?

SG: And for 2, you are too nice.

Me: ??? I am nice to people who are nice to me and mean to people who are mean to me la! Everyone is what!!

SG: ...

SG, continues: You are confirm not Xiaxue.

Me: Ok. (Little fucker slut trying to tell me what I am and what I am not!)

SG: Xiaxue would never use such a lame user pic. (If I didn't know she hated me I'd think she's my greatest fan...)

Me: What?! I think my user pic totally looks like me.

Now for those of you who don't know, Viwawa allows all their users to create a little avatar doll that looks like what I showed. You can change her (or his) hair, eyes, clothes etc. Everyone's doll looks more or less the same with different colours and features.



SG screeched.



SG: NO IT DOES NOT!

I finally understood how it feels like to be all "..." because I was literally speechless.

Me, a little impatiently and indignantly: Why does it not? I have blonde hair and I'm tan and I totally have that dress in real life!!

SG: ...



And with that last "..." she left the mahjong room highly agitated.


Just now, I got another irritating online MJ kaki. By this time I've learnt my lesson, decided against using Xiaxue and created another account.



Me: Fucking MSN is not allowing me to sign in again!

Another stupid person: Oei!!!

(I ignored her)

ASP: No fowl language please! (And yes she spelt it this way)

Me: Why? Are you underaged?

ASP: No. Mother of 2.

Me: Oic. Well... Are your kids sitting on your lap now reading what I say?

ASP: Nope.

Me: Then I don't see what the problem is.

ASP: Keep it clean please.

Me: Stop being a prude and telling people what to do.



And with that I leave the room. And I cannot go on MSN to complain to people, so here I am blogging!! WTFFFFFFFFFFFFF??! There are so many fucking retards around I tell you!!

I SAY FUCK WHENEVER I WANT!!!! ROARRRRRR!!

FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK!!!!

Irritating la! I fucking hate all these moralistic high browed fuckers.

I don't care if you think foul language is a no-no for your freaking children, but there are people in this world who are not living their lives for your kids ok! If you don't want your kids to hear foul language, I'm sorry, but the only way is to dig out his eardrums lor!! If I don't say, then his fucking classmates will to anyway, what's the big fucking deal?!

And besides, the fucking kids are not even looking at the monitor or what! It's not like I am saying FUCK to her kids' faces!!

AND WHAT IS WITH THE MOTHER OF TWO BULLSHIT?!

JUST BECAUSE YOU SPREAD YOUR LEGS TWICE FOR YOUR HUSBAND TO SHOOT HIS SPERM INSIDE YOU AND THEN GAVE BIRTH DOES NOT GIVE YOU THE RIGHTS TO DEMAND ANYTHING FROM ANYONE OK?!?! In fact, it only makes you a mother, not MY mother!

Annoying leh these people!!

I'm gonna abruptly change topic and ask you all to check out the new videos from Click Network.

XIAXUE'S GUIDE TO LIFE

Thinking of not looking like a whale anymore?? Yet, you are so lazy and your hands seem to, on their own accord, steal all your friends' KFC chicken skins when they are not looking? LOOK NO FURTHER!! Acupuncture might be the solution for you!!

Or you can just get a sadistic pleasure out of watching me get poked by needles.

CHICK VS DICK

Love spicy food?? Bet you still can't beat either of these crazy people, as Paul Twohill and Kaykay go on a rampage to find out who can conquer that deceivingly small chilli padi. Among other very, very spicy stuff. *shudders*


p/s: I've got my Langkawi trip's photos to edit so I'll update with all the photos as soon as possible. Langkawi was awesome!!! And I am super tan now!! Comments not allowed.

ALAN VEGA – STATION (MUTE RECORDS)

ALAN VEGA – STATION (MUTE RECORDS)

At the moment I find myself encountering numerous amounts of one man electronica aggro outfits. They try hard, they really do but these skinny and zitty sea monkey types come nowhere to even holding a candle to the sheer presence, importance and efficiency of Alan Vega and his legacy as lightning rod of Suicide.

On the eve of entering his sixties, the world of Alan Vega is an uglier proposition than ever as he acts as a mirror and serves us with a timely broadcast and state of the union address.

Despite the barrage of noise attached to this record there is a surprising amount of empathy amongst the overt blasts of apparent apathy, you sense that this is a man that is concerned for his children and the world that they will grow up in.

With vocals delivered as if recited and address through a PA at a rally descending into a riot it is a very tough listen to get through, quite removed from the buzzing drone of Suicide, now replaced by heavy beats often provided by his wife. Outside right now contractors are constructing a new super market behind my apartment and with the window open at times I am finding it tough to distinguish which sounds are originating from this record and their machinery.

In an industry that is swamped and over-run by chancers, at the Dirty Three ATP earlier this year Alan Vega was one of the runaway highlights for me and he was never more scathing than when launching into the eco conscious “Warrior, Fight Fa Ya Life”, a sci-fi horror story of a song heading straight into science fact if Mr Vega amongst millions is to be believed. “Psychopatha” deals with the issue of parents accounting for their kin fighting in Iraq, a similar ground addressed in “Traceman”, a song with a heavy stench of death applied. “Crime Street Cree” benefits from repetitive beats that sound like helicopter blades pierced with machine gun fire taken from a battle field while “Gun God Game” proves the fastest paced of the crop. The album closes with “Devastated” with Vega sounding defeated and in pain musing “how’s the future going to play out for our kids?”

At times the record out and out loses all coherence but if ever you need a wake up call or indeed need to deliver one, feel free to call on Alan Vega.

Thesaurus moment: cranky.

Alan Vega
Mute Records

Win $10,000 cash and a chance to be on the cover of FHM!

Advertorial

Ladies, Munkysuperstar Pictures is casting for a brand new Channel 5 TV show looking for the ultimate superbabe and FHM cover girl!

If you think you have what it takes, please email casting@munkysuperstar.com with your name, age, contact number, occupation, and a recent photo of yourself.

Auditions for the show are ongoing till March 2nd, 2008.


REQUIREMENTS

• Between 18 - 30 years old


• Attractive


• Outspoken


• Most importantly: look great in a bikini!

Please spread the word and forward this to everyone you know; you might actually see one of them on TV in the future!

NIRVANA – HORMOANING (DGC)

NIRVANA – HORMOANING (DGC)

With the desire and demand for Nirvana product far outweighing supply suddenly an import market was born. And this was the pricy prize release that could only be afforded by the fortunate (at the time).

The six song Hormoaning EP was a collection of two unused studio tracks and all four songs from the Peel session recorded on 21 October 1990 all of which were cover versions. The record was released in Australia and Japan in February 1992 to coincide with the band’s Asian tour. Later half the tracks would appear on Incesticide but for the longest time (with the “Smells Like Teen Spirit” single off the shelves and thus its b-sides with it) it felt like the only place “Even In His Youth” could be heard. Thus one day when feeling particularly partisan and flush I parted with £21 to Andy’s Record to buy the Japanese version of this CD.

The record opens with their cover of “Turnaround” originally by Devo. This has always seemed like a strange selection of cover to me as it has seemed to be a song Devo have buried themselves. It is the b-side to “Girl U Want” but other than a collection of demos, correct me if I’m wrong, I don’t think it has appeared focally on any of their releases. Regardless it is a great song that Nirvana enhances and does a lot of justice to.

Next up follows the Craig Montgomery version of “Aneurysm” that features on the “Smells Like Teen Spirit” single and not on Incesticide. This version is somewhat flatter than the aforementioned session cut and thus fails to compliment one of the best non-album (studio album) tracks in the band’s collection.

Another cover follows in the form of “D-7” which was originally by The Wipers. This is track was also recorded as part of the Peel session and later appeared on the “Lithium” single as a b-side. The song itself is a brooding, sounding almost slovenly and intoxicated in its build up before the song explodes to a twice the speed race to the finish that includes a weird rattling and whistling dose of feedback while Kurt screams his head off. This would not be the only song of The Wipers that the band covered as they would also cover “Return Of The Rat” for another compilation.

With tracks four and six Nirvana introduced the world to The Vaselines, an obscure eighties indie band from Scotland that were twee and a blatant inspiration to Belle And Sebastian and the like. Later to appear on Incesticide the songs “Molly’s Lips” and “Son Of A Gun” are something of a perfect correlation of indie song with a nursery rhythm. With insane repetition the lyrics are instantly memorable and thus songs that immediately win both hearts and minds. The greatest gift.

While not being spectacular this was a good solid EP. A handsome release.

Thesaurus moment: gratuity.

Nirvana
DGC

Jetting Off

How lucky am I?

I'm jetting off today via Silkair to Langkawi for a short trip!

It's 1056am now as I am typing this, and I haven't slept yet coz I played overnight MJ, haha... I woke up at 5pm.

Yesterday I woke up at 9pm and went to White Sands to collect a parcel at 11am (haven't sleep yet obviously).

I brought a burger into the cab on the way home, and the cab driver was like, "WAH... Your breakfast ah?!"

Tired beyond words, I just said yeah to un-complicate things, since the burger was actually more like my... supper?

And the Cab Uncle commented, "Wah! So late then eat breakfast? Almost lunch already!"

-_-

Is it so unfathomable that some people sleep (extremely) late?

SO ANYWAY!!!

I'm going off on a SPONSORED TRIP for an advertorial!!! All thanks to the lovely, lovely, NUFFNANG!! (Which I support 100% btw - do check out their site for their BDAE freebies!!)

Qihua is going with me (since Mike can't get off), and there is nothing better than a trip that is not only free but actually pays you money!! Awesome.

I'm gonna go sleep now, so I'll update whenever I can. I'm bringing my lappie with me!

Luv luv!!

NICK CAVE AND THE BAD SEEDS – (ARE YOU) THE ONE THAT I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR? (MUTE)

NICK CAVE AND THE BAD SEEDS – (ARE YOU) THE ONE THAT I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR? (MUTE)

A number of years ago my mother caught me listening to this song on Christmas Day morning and she appeared to become rather worried about me. The sentiments that were coming from the song appeared to be echoing my sense of loneliness and feeling unloved on such an important day in the calendar. I think what she failed to understand what just how reassuring the track being, serving as a reminder that melancholy can be universal and at a time when these emotions appear most it is good to acknowledge and indulge in these things in order to provide a sense of worth in existence. The value of such things can never afford to be underestimated.

There is a real vulnerability being displayed on this record. The level of humility and desired closure being aired serves as a rare gesture of guarded optimism and potential wish fulfilment. It is maturity at its most immature.

Musically the song glistens as it glides through proceedings at a downbeat pace with low notes and a suggested melancholy which eventually builds to a rising sense of grace. Taken on a bad day it might sound overblown and unnecessarily wondrous but if despatched to a sensible mind the beauty floods right out.

Lifted from The Boatman’s Call this is the most evocative of moments for Cave, where his muse is obvious to all he just does not care, seemingly happy to put it all out on the line and get battered in the process. This arrival at a new stage.

Elsewhere on the release “Come Into My Sleep” is a majestic romp with a gloriously humming pulse and yet another clear message even it is sounds sent from a swamp. Nice Hammond from Harvey.

Also from The Boatman’s Call, present here is the “band version” of “Black Hair”. It’s a very different vintage, surprisingly calmer and no longer necessarily reminiscent of Tindersticks.

The less said about “Babe, I Got You Bad” the better.

All this hard work is necessary.

Thesaurus moment: arrival.

Nick Cave And The Bad Seeds
Mute

Good morning everyone!!!

Apparently, everytime I blog something vaguely about sex I get onto the Chinese tabloid headlines, which is really quite irritating. (The previous entry got onto Shin Min. WTF?!)

Anyway I am so kpo about the Edison Chen scandal!!

I saw this photo of Cecilia Cheung, and I just burst out laughing...

(NSFW.. not for kids either. Shoo!)



CLICK



HAO XIAO BU HAO XIAO?!?!?!?!?!!

I know it's very mean to laugh at a badly taken photo of her at this point la, but really lor, she so chio also can have a horrible photo!!

Her expression is just really funny! And her body look like starved African child leh, so skinny... She looks like she was just saying to Edison: "Oei stop taking the photos for a while, I'm not prepared!" then he still continue snapping. LOL!!!

Anyway, I think by now most of you have already seen the photos, so if you wanna read my main blog entry for today (which is about the photo scandal), click HERE.

NSFW and not for underaged people whose irresponsible parents are allowing them to go online freely!

AHEM. The entry, in case it is illegal, is not written by me.


ANYWAYS!!!


New videos on Clicknetwork!!


WATCH!!!

Xiaxue's Guide to Life

Since you horrid people are constantly harping on me being fat,
I've decided to lose weight!

Maybe I can also teach you how to do it without exercising...

Chick VS Dick

There's nothing more funny than watching famous people get drunk.

Who is the better drunk, Paul Twohill or Kaykay?

Click la, then you can find out!

Till I next get inspired, tata!!

(Comments disabled still, sorry...)


p/s: I am looking for a part-time maid!! If you got a good one to intro and she charges $10 per hour and doesn't mind coming to the east, tell me can?

My current maid is damn shitty lor, she ai mai then cancel on me, and I pay her to work 4 hours and she leaves after 2?!?! WTF? And she does a shitty half-fucked job!!

p/p/s: Don't intro chio maid hor... You know angmohs like to fuck maids lor! Mike doesn't APPEAR to be that sort but you'll never know. So better if it's lao auntie.

p/p/p/s: I know you are thinking: "You don't blog, you don't work... you laze around all day and yet you want a maid!? Why can't you clean your own house?"

Because, my dear... Life is too short to be doing stuff you don't like, especially if you can afford not to!!

My email is xiaxue@gmail.com. Loves!!

MORRISSEY – THAT’S HOW PEOPLE GROW UP (DECCA)

MORRISSEY – THAT’S HOW PEOPLE GROW UP (DECCA)

Possessing some of the chunkiest guitar on a Morrissey song in like forever, here is a new Morrissey single which serves as a good excuses for a new Best Of/Greatest Hits compilation. Never let it be said he doesn’t make money out of his catalogue.

The return of Morrissey is one of the greatest things that could happen to music at this time. The man still looks fantastic and has the quick wit and sharp tongue that is sadly missing from the latest generation of dandy fops attempting to rock the charts and sadly failing.

Morrissey has always served to represent a corner of England of the darkest humour and ironic self depreciation of self mockery that isn’t really meant but all the same serves as a shield for saying what you really think and really mean – this is irony irony.

Here like a true baby he begins with the lines “I was wasting my time trying to fall in love” before launching into some kind of “live and learn” conclusion that seems to put it all into perspective for Morrissey, too much fucking perspective if you ask me. It all sounds rather needy to me, I know we’ve been here before. Then he finally plays us all for suckers by informing of how he is “OK anyway.” What kind of message is this one? What is to be taken from this? Quite frankly Mozza, I don’t think your audience wants to grow up. In a lot of respects I don’t really think they want to meet someone and fall in love. Shame.

The flipside here deals a live version of “Why Don’t You Find Out For Yourself” in a weird harmonica moment. Its not strong.

The day I knew I had grown up was the one where I admitted to myself “yeah, if I were a teenager I’d laugh at me too.”

Its always good.

Thesaurus moment: ripe.

Morrissey
Decca