Stressed out

I had a lot of trouble sleeping last night. I just had so many problems that were constantly on my mind. I can say that I could barely sleep and I only slept for an hour. I wanted to sleep later but when i tried, I couldn't even manage to shut my eye, I just feel that theres something stuck up my ass.

Seriously, I know I worry too much but it's so hard sometimes to deal with all these things, I know my problems will get worse as I get older and I will learn how to better manage myself, but honestly, dealing with stress isn't one of my best attributes and I often come to a point where I can't breath and I just want to let it out.

Sometimes I think of suicide but then again, I would be more comfortable killing myself when I don't leave behind problems for my family rather than killing myself and leaving them tons of shit to deal with.

I know it seems scary that I am thinking about suicide as a whole but seriously, these lonely night lying in my room, worrying, and fearing for no reason, I know it's nothing big, but I can't help but feel this way is just taking a toll on me and I am quite sick of this feeling.

I hope everything will turn up at the near future though:(

xoxo

Jeffrey James